Mourning Royalty
February 16, 2010
Duchess was a queen around our place.

Duchess in October 2009
I stroked her supine burgundy-bay neck, gently running my hand over the haircoat that lay the wrong way, running from withers to poll. No one had ever told her it was supposed to go the other way.
Just like no one had ever told her that horses weren’t supposed to live to be 40. Or that they weren’t supposed to die the day after Valentine’s Day, with three children peering out the window and preemptively mourning the loss of their “grandma horse.”
She had been my mom’s horse, having outlived her owner by almost 14 years. Taking care of her — with three meals a day of senior feed gruel, a pink blanket to stave off the cold, a fan in the summertime and plenty of wither scritches in between — had been a way to honor my mom, to say thanks for all she had done for me. After all, it was she who bequeathed to me my love of horses, the thing that has become my therapy and my life.
Duchess was one of our first horses, the one we bought nearly 30 years ago from a low-end auction before we knew you weren’t really supposed to do that. If I remember correctly, we paid $650 for her, at a time when “good” horses were going for much more than that. She turned out to be golden. She was a gaited horse of unknown origin, and when our 4-H horse club went trail riding, Duchess and my mom were right there, gliding over the ground beside me and my Quarter Horse.
She was sound right up to the end, although her eyesight had begun to fail, and she could no longer eat hay or solid grain. The first time she went down was also her last; she was unable to get up, and our vet came over quickly and confirmed what I already knew: It was time.
Examining her gum color, he marveled at her teeth. The lower incisors, which slant forward as a horse ages, were laying straight ahead, almost parallel with her jaw bone. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen a horse that old,” he said, stroking her on her cheek.
Today, it’s noontime as I write this – time for Duchess’ lunch — and I almost got up to go soak her food. But she doesn’t need it today. Last night, I talked to the kids about how heaven has wonderful, lush green pastures where she can eat all she wants. She can run again, maybe even buck if she wants to. And if she misses her senior feed, I know my mom will take care of that.
Vaya con dios,
Holly Clanahan
Editor, America’s Horse magazine
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10 Comments on “Mourning Royalty”
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February 16th, 2010 at 3:36 pm
Holly, I’m so sorry for your loss!! No matter how long they are with us, it’s never long enough.
February 16th, 2010 at 4:28 pm
What a beautiful story – in a time when we are bombarded with the roundups & acts of cruelty I found it very heart warming to read your words. How wonderful that someone cared enough to look after her as she deserved to the very end. I hope I can do the same for my horses.
February 16th, 2010 at 6:25 pm
Holly-I am so very sorry for you and your children! How lucky your mare was,though,to have had a family who loved her so much and took care of her always. And how lucky we all are,to have these wonderful animals in our lives-they really do leave hoofprints on our hearts!
February 16th, 2010 at 11:53 pm
Thanks, guys, for the warm thoughts. I’m glad Duchess was able to touch others’ lives, as well as ours.
February 17th, 2010 at 9:42 am
Dutchess will be missed! She was always so patient with me while I attempted to get that blanket on her. Whether I had to stop with it hanging off her cause I couldn’t find a strap or realzied I had it on backwards. Never bothered her a bit. I will really miss her!!
February 17th, 2010 at 10:39 am
Your story reminds me of the love we still hold for our Poco Cooper Penny. She left us almost 3 years ago at 32 and we still laugh and cry at the many things she did to bring happiness to our family. We will never stop loving her as you will never stop loving Dutchess. Aren’t we lucky to have had such wonderful horses.
February 17th, 2010 at 11:46 am
Holly, reading your story brought tears to my eyes as I remember my Dutch…who lived to 30 and had to be put down in August of 2008. I know how hard it is after 30 years of feeding and caring for your best friend, to make that decision that is going to change your routine forever. You may have another, but none takes the place of a horse that has been with you for so many years. My Dutch was the kind of horse that would have come in the house and been happy to just be with you. My daughter did get to be around him for her first 6 years, and he was the horse that taught her not to be afraid.
Regards, Linda Lawton
February 17th, 2010 at 11:34 pm
god bless you and your family at this most precarious of times!
February 18th, 2010 at 7:56 am
Amazing story and so full of love. Thanks for sharing. When you said:
The first time she went down was also her last; she was unable to get up, and our vet came over quickly and confirmed what I already knew: It was time.
It reminded me of a 36 year old that my father in law had for most of his life.
February 28th, 2010 at 9:03 am
To have such a love in our lives is the greatest gift we could ever receive. What a love story to share with your children. May God Bless all of you.