Kate Middleton is a modern-day Cinderella, but prefers a Rolls-Royce Phantom to four white horses for her wedding to Prince William.

By Lesley Martin for America’s Horse Daily

Two Bits dreamt of pulling Kate Middleton's carriage in the royal wedding. Carriage art by Ellie Martin.

England’s Prince William will marry commoner Kate Middleton tomorrow morning, and AQHA Mascot Two Bits thinks his invitation has been lost in the mail.

You see, he’d been following this fairytale romance since the beginning, and once they were engaged, he offered to help pull the bride’s Glass Coach from Buckingham Palace to Westminster Abbey, as is royal wedding tradition. But when there was no response, Two Bits became worried … “Surely the royal family will call any day now,” Two Bits thought as the big day approached.

But then, the heartbreaking news: Kate traded in a horse-drawn carriage for another type of horsepower – a Rolls-Royce.

Not only is tradition broken, but nothing can compare to the majesty of an American Quarter Horse, not even a Rolls-Royce! Two Bits was devastated.

Then he found out Prince William and Kate will be riding away from the wedding in a royal carriage. “Thank Fairy Godmothers, I have a chance!” thought Two Bits. But then he found out that he didn’t even match the criteria of the Queen’s “Windsor Greys”: 16 hands or taller, stoutly built and gray.

Hmm … Maybe it just wasn’t meant to be.

So, Two Bits will be watching the wedding from the comfort of his stall, like everybody else. And instead of waking up at 4 a.m. (EST), he’s just going to take a lot of Red Cell and pull an all-nighter. ’Til then, here are some real registered American Quarter Horse names he pulled out of the AQHA registry! Enjoy, and live happily ever-after.

Prince William

Princess Kate

Prince Charming

King

Kate Kissin

Her Scottish Nickers

Kate Lady

Wedding Jetters

Kate Monarch

Royal Wedding Belle

Kate’s Man

Fairy Tale

Kate’s Princess

Wedding Invitation

Fairytale Ending

Kate N A Hat

Fairytale Romance

Kate’s Will

Wedding Bells

Prince of Wales

Wedding Cake

Buckingham Palace

Windsor Prince

Royal Engagement

Buckingham Queen

Her Royal Highness

Middleton Heiress

Westminster Abby

Windsor Willie

Welsh Princess

Her Royal Grooviness

Windsor and Water

Happily Wed

Wedding Guest

Happily Ever After

Queen Mum

Guest List

His Royal Highness

Kensington

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